primitive thoughts

Honesty, Excitment or Just Working the System

2007-08-29T16:09:00.000-07:00

So first day of Kindergarten was today...this comes after an evening of walking to the school showing Brooke the classroom etc. She and I talked about the importance of being to school on time. It was a good father daughter time.

At 6:15 this morning Brooke came in to wake me up..."wake up daddy, I can't be late for school" (this coming from a child who sleeps in until 9:00 AM most days). So I drag myself out of bed only to find Brooke completely dressed and pretty much ready to go....it was 6:20 AM (School started at 8:15 AM). So in an effort to pass the time and have some good father daughter bonding time I suggested we go out to breakfast to celebrate her first day of school. So just prior to walking out the door I stopped her so I could take the obligatory first day of kindergarten pictures:

We then went to get breakfast; on the way we made sure to drive by the school just to make sure nobody else was there (it was 6:45 AM). Along the way we were having a really good talk; she was expressing both her nervousness as well as excitement about starting school. Then two bites into breakfast she said she was not hungry...so after some discussion and a few more bites we left and came home. So we could get ready to walk to school. Well About 10 minutes prior to our departure...Brooke asked for a drink (which being a nice dad I gave to her)...Then it happened she __________ (fill in your favorite euphemism for vomiting). She was still committed to going to school...I had to tell her no she was going to stay home today (she had a fever as well).

So less than one hour after her first day of school pictures...Brooke was back in her PJs and on the couch:

So I am left to wonder after such an outstanding first day of school...was she just honestly sick? Just really excited/nervous about school....or is she some sort of prodigy who has already learned how to work both the educational system and her parents and is already ditching school...(this would be quite impressive seeing how she hadn't even started yet).

Talk is Cheap & So is Arrogance

2007-08-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

So I just got back from my oldest daughters orientation to kindergarten...what an exciting time. I find myself chewing on a healthy dose of reality that I find about as appetizing as gnawing on some drywall.

A few months ago when we were determining where to place Brooke in school (our community has open enrollment), we made the choice to place her in an under-performing school. We had the thought that we might be able to go into a school that many are trying to avoid and perhaps have a great platform for bringing about the reality of the Gospel to this part of the community. Initially this decision exposed an incredible amount of arrogance in my heart (usually questioning other's decisions regarding education etc). And most recently it has exposed a sense of desperation...that romantic idealism of ministry in a needy environment has met reality of life. Our family will only have an effective ministry at this school if we choose to make the investment of our time and energy into the people there (i know this is not profound....but it is just a glimpse at how mentally challenged i am at times). Ministry here won't just happen...I have to be purposeful and intentional.

This is a scary time for me...because if i am not faithful to actually live out the reality of the gospel with these people at the school....then I have knowingly, and willingly put my daughter at a bit of a disadvantage for no good purpose. It only makes sense if we live a life of ministry and invest into those people at the school.

The Cost of Relational Education

2007-08-27T00:59:00.000-07:00

So I am finishing up some adjustments for the next semester's syllabi (yes it does start later today...but I still count this as the night before). And it has got me thinking; At Eternity Bible College we put a huge emphasis upon relationships and building of community and trying to reflect an aspect of the Church. In fact as a faculty we have discussed the corespondent relationship between the depth of relationship between teacher and student and the quality of education a student receives, we have discussed the necessity of being in relationship with a student as you deconstruct aspect of their thinking, and how their needs to be a relationship to sustain the precarious time of instability as a new foundation (hopefully a biblical one) is put in place.

But while we have talked of all of this, we have failed to address something quite obvious, something that is glaring at me as I write this. There is a high cost to pay for such relationships, I just spent the past two years pouring and investing into the students that have since graduated and moved on...and now I must make that same investment into these new students knowing full well that in a few years I will go through the heart ache all over again. There are so many reasons i can nurture as to why I should not invest into these new students:

I should maintain relationship with past students, that will take up most of my time
It does not seem natural to pursue relationships with people for such a short time...so i will invest into people I will be involved with for the long haul
These students don't really know me
I don't really know them
It is painful to establish and invest into people knowing that they will soon move on

But none of these excuses really hold up...so as sit up the night before a new semester starts I am praying that God will give me the strength and the grace to love these students and invest into them because that is what He would have me do. and at the end of the day Luke 17 comes to mind... I really am only doing that which I ought to do .

Is God Really Supernatural IV

2007-08-18T13:12:00.000-07:00

So I know with a degree of certainty that Scripture is sufficient, authoritative, inspired etc. (I would most certainly affirm the Chicago Statement on biblical inerancy). I know that the Bible is the ultimate authority and that God has revealed himself through His Word. I also know that God reveals Himself through nature (because the Bible tells me so, Psalm 19, Romans 1).
So the question I have been wrestling with recently is dreams...can God use dreams to communicate with his people?
I know any dream would be entirely subject to the authority of the Bible...but is the God we serve one who still uses dreams to communicate to His people?
Recently two different accounts have got me questioning this:

One friend of mine (pre-Christ) was about to create a heinous crime...he had a dream where Jesus told him not to go through with it...this was a contributing factor in him coming to salvation.
A second friend had a dream where some sin was being addressed in another persons life...so upon waking up he went and asked the individual if this sin is indeed a struggle and indeed it was.

I am not sure I have this compartment in my theological mind.

Personal Relections: Another Question

2007-08-18T12:43:00.000-07:00

So I was going through our pictures from the past few months and came across an event that really left me wondering why certain things in history do indeed repeat themselves. I was in High School in the 80's, I remember the fashion: the cardigan sweaters (black & white with shades of gray), the skinny string bean ties, the Member's Only Jackets, and of course the Izod or Polo shirts. And it should be noted that many of these fashions were in some pastel pallet. I have many pictures of me wearing pastels: lavender, mint green, light yellow, and certainly pink. I thought that my time wearing pink was a thing of the past, I then confronted with harsh reality that History does indeed repeat itself: YES I AM BACK IN PINK! (a frightening flashback of days gone by)

Autonomy vs. Relationships

2007-08-17T06:48:00.000-07:00

So I recently came across a blog that begins to address a significant issue that I have been processing through. I would encourage you to read through all three posts on if relationships are optional (by the way feel free to read some of the comments...one of which i posted).

It is something I have been processing through a lot recently...but hey read this link first. There will be more to come.

Is God Really Supernatural III?

2007-08-16T18:02:00.000-07:00

So in an attempt to make this more personal...some of you may know this already but please bear with me. A few months ago I was playing basketball and tweaked my knee pretty good. So I did what most of us would do I went to the orthopedic doctor (that seemed reasonable, I knew i messed it up). The initial diagnosis was a torn ACL. A friend of mine was here from Uganda, Jedediah was puzzled as to why my first response was to go to the doctor...He was wondering why we did not first pray over it and ask that God would heal my knee (My response at this point I am rather embarrassed to confess was to think...but that is not the way a torn ACL is fixed in order for an ACL to be healed that way would be supernatural...silly me to think that God could actually be supernatural).
A group of us determined to pray that God would heal my knee,but only after two orthopedics both assessed the injury as a torn ACL. In retrospect the events that followed are quite comical. About a week after starting to pray for healing, My physical therapist was accessing my knee and said he did not believe the injury was as bad as he initially thought. One week later he and another therapist both assessed my knee and both concluded that they did not believe there was enough instability to warrant surgery and thought that my knee was pretty stable. The following week (now after three weeks of somewhat regular prayer) my therapist compared my left knee to the injured right knee...the results were rather startling he said my injured knee was actually more stable than the left knee.
Now here is a glimpse of how naturalistic I am; knowing that we had been praying that God would heal my knee. My response to hearing that my right knee was more stable than my left...I concluded that both of the orthopedic doctors had mis-diagnosed my knee. Unintentionally (or intentionally) I refused to acknowledge the possibility that perhaps God actually did heal my knee.

Why?

2007-08-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

So I have recently come across something that just leaves me wondering...Why?

I must admit, I did laugh hysterically but I was also left wondering if this was an attempt to be really funny and satirical or if there was some degree of seriousness to it.

Either way, this was a sad reminder for me of days long since past when I used to hang out in the Christian bookstore perusing the most current Christan music and I came across a chart that said if you like _____ (fill in your favorite secular music) you will probably like _____(insert Christian substitute). A sad reality hit me that it seems like the world is certainly influencing the "Church" but does not seem like the church is influencing the world much. (at least I have not seen such a chart on itunes...if you like Larry Norman you will probably like Eric Clapton)

So regardless of how funny the video is (i have watched it multiple times) Why Godtube? and Why such a silly little chart...and why the testimints (the "christian" breath mint next to the cash register at the Christian bookstore). WHY?

Is God Really Supernatural II?

2007-08-15T23:07:00.000-07:00

So how do you respond to the following:

The shootings at Virginia Tec.h this past Spring.
Any "natural disaster"
An ability to speak (and translate) a language fluently with less than a semester of formal study.
Someone saying that they are recieving dreams/visions.
Someone mentioning demonic affliction/possesion of an individual.

If I were to be honest I would say that my response to all of these would at best be suspect more likely skeptical. I would have explained away the VaTech shootings as a guy who just imigrated to a new land and did not assimilate well, a social outcast etc...Natural disasters can easily be explained away naturally; and as far as the last three I would be skeptical at best.

But ought that be the case? Recently I have come across all of these situations and have realized that all certainly have a biblical precedent. (I have some friend who explained the VaTech shootings as a man who was demonically influenced...they could think of no other reason for such things...they view "natural disasters" as God doing his work to judge some and bless others). Just currious how you all view these things.

Is God Really Supernatural?

2007-08-07T11:43:00.003-07:00

So this will be the first of many posts regarding the supernatural. My thinking has been stirred in this area recently and I have been left with the question: Is the God I worship & serve really a supernatural God? While working towards an answer I have come to realize a few things:

as a product of western culture, I have been nurtured in a naturalistic culture (western culture can explain away most things with scientific reasoning etc).
as a product of conservative churches and conservative schools, I have been at best skeptical of supernatural things...largely because I did not want to be identified as a pentecostal type.

so I have been thinking (and I think have come to the place) where I have recognized that not only do I have one foot in a hole; but there are at least two holes in my thinking in this regard and I have a foot in each. I am just begining to realize that I have some deficiencies in these areas...and want to continue to explore the question: is God really supernatural (because maybe up to this point in my life He has not been)

Athletics & Culture

2007-08-06T11:53:00.000-07:00

Just a bit of reflection on the current state of athletics and the societal bemoanings of all of the indiscretions afflicting current athletic endeavors. Within the past month the sporting world has been rocked with all sorts of indiscretions:

-Barry Bonds pursuit of the home run record (and alleged bennefit of steroids)
-an NBA official involved in a gambling and point shaving scheme,
-to multiple participants in the recent Tour de France being removed for performance enhancing drugs.

I am left asking the question why are people outraged by the athletic community? Are they doing something different that many people in their given professions? Are they just a more public representation of this given culture?

It would seem that many people in society would look to get an advantage if it would benefit their own interests. This is a sad state for our culture but while people are aplauded for how they can evade taxes, and maximize their bottom line...aren't athletes simply doing the same thing? It certainly does not make it right..just consistent with the rest of society.

a feeble attempt to remain somewhat culturally relevant

2007-07-27T14:52:00.000-07:00

It is odd that an attempt to remain culturally relevant (creating and posting a blog), removes me one step away from relationships with people. In a society where people are screaming out for relationships it is incredibly odd that one of the means by which to do this is to isolate oneself behind a keyboard for a time and post musings and read other people's insights etc. However ironic that may be I am now jumping in with one foot.